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Tuesday, May 18, 2010

The 6 Steps of Inner Bonding

The 6 Steps of Inner Bonding

Practicing the Six Steps of Inner Bonding leads you along the spiritual path of healing the ego/wounded self and creating communion with God. Practicing them on a daily basis leads to the development of a loving, spiritually-connected Adult. A brief overview of the Six Steps are presented here.

Step One: Willingness to Feel Pain and Take Responsibility for Your Feelings

Move into the present moment and focus within, tuning into your feelings - the physical sensations within the body. Choose to be mindful of and pay attention to all distressing feelings rather than protect against them with substance and process addictions. Make a conscious decision that you WANT to take responsibility for your feelings.

Step Two: Move into the Intent to Learn

Invite the compassionate Presence of Spirit into your being to help you learn what you are doing or thinking that may be causing your pain. In Inner Bonding there are only two possible intents in any given moment: to protect against pain and avoid responsibility for it through trying to control yourself and others, or to learn about what you are doing or thinking that may be causing your pain so that you can move into loving yourself and others. When you are in the intent to learn you are a loving Adult. When you are in the intent to protect and avoid you are operating from your ego wounded self, or child-adult. In Step Two, you welcome and embrace all your feelings with compassion.

Step Three: Dialogue with Your Wounded self and Core Self

Discover the thoughts/false beliefs from your wounded that may be causing your fear and pain; release anger and pain in appropriate ways; learn about the past that created the false beliefs; nurture your wounded self; explore your core Self and what brings you joy.

Step Four: Dialogue with Your Higher Guidance

Ask your spiritual Guidance (whatever that is for you): What is the truth about the thoughts/false beliefs you may have uncovered in Step Three? and What is the loving behavior toward your Inner Child in this situation? What is in your highest good? What is kind to yourself? Open and allow the answers to come through you in words, pictures or feelings. The answers may not come immediately, but if you have a sincere desire to learn, they will come.

Step Five: Take Loving Action

Tell yourself the truth and take the loving action that came through from your Guidance in Step Four; put God/Spirit into action. Consciously move into gratitude for your Guidance that is always here for you.

Step Six: Evaluate Your Action

Check in to see if your pain, anger and shame are getting healed. If not, go back through the steps until you discover the truth and actions that bring you peace, joy, and a deep sense of intrinsic worth.

These Steps will come alive for you as you learn and practice the Inner Bonding process.

... created for healing the world by Margaret Paul  and Erika Chopich at


  1. Sometimes
    if we start to tell a different story
    that is the story
    that will come true

    once upon a time there was this amazing bright energy
    that decided it would be REALLY FUN AND AMAZING
    to go to planet earth

    and so she decided the exact moment to go
    and poof she was created into a being
    they named

    The magicgoddessmedicinewoman daria
    there has NEVER BEEN A DARIA before
    not like this daria
    no way no how
    this daria was magnificent and amazing and
    really quite a
    force of nature
    so much so that she almost knocked herself out with her zappy electric connection to
    all that is

    daria had decided
    before she came
    to take the highest level of difficulty
    she could imagine

    just for kicks
    just to challenge herself
    and expand

    she thought it's be FUN

    hahahahahahahaha and she knew when she came to earth that she was connected to source energy

  2. that she could tell how well she was doing by
    how she FELT along the way

    and so when she felt good, she rejoiced and enjoyed and appreciated

    and when she felt a little off
    or even a lot off
    or even downright wretched and
    possibly even doomsdayish

    she knew she only need search for Relief
    in the Now
    in the way she felt

    like, for example,
    reminding herself of the Emotional scale
    Abraham hicks developed.

    The Emotional Guidance Scale

    1. Joy/Appreciation/Empowered/Freedom/Love
    2. Passion
    3. Enthusiasm/Eagerness/Happiness
    4. Positive Expectation/Belief
    5. Optimism
    6. Hopefulness
    7. Contentment
    8. Boredom
    9. Pessimism
    10. Frustration/Irritation/Impatience
    11. Overwhelment
    12. Disappointment
    13. Doubt
    14. Worry
    15. Blame
    16. Discouragement
    17. Anger
    18. Revenge
    19. Hatred/Rage
    20. Jealousy
    21. Insecurity/Guilt/Unworthiness
    22. Fear/Grief/Depression/Despair/Powerlessness

  3. and so if she felt despair, she would just search for the next thought that would bring even the smallest amount of Relief.

    That is all that was needed. She needn't jump from despair to joy. Just a little jump
    to a feeling of supreme unworthiness would help. believe it or not. and then maybe even a baby step into jealousy. now that's not hard. look at all those other people getting what they want so easily. damn them!

    ok well that wasn't so hard. well let's take one more baby step shall we? I HATE THEM! I HATE THIS AND THAT AND HER AND HIM FOR ALL SORTS OF VALID REASONS!

    Good, good! This is excellent. Much better than despair! Great! Now we can start plotting our revenge on all our enemies and frenemies too! Ah yes, those little F*ckers! Ah, sweet revenge! I will show you how it's done! Damn you all!

    ah yes, i can feel the increased amount of energy with this revenge thing but the feeling is still kind of ick.


    Excellent! Well done!

    Now let's see if we might even take one more baby step into discouragement.

    ooooooohhhhhh i feel helpless and like nothing will ever change and i just haven't got what it takes. etc etc.

    It is SO AND SO'S FAULT! DAMN THEM! (See how easy we moved up into blame! great!!!)

  4. yes yes, what is the next step? we only need search for Relief, remember. well the next step up is worry. oh, that's easy. i can make a list of all my worries. let me do that.

    I have no faith whatsoever I will ever climb out of this wretched pit of bad feeling I have fallen into (DOUBT). I doubt a great many things actually. and with good reason etc etc.

    oh gosh, i feel so disappointed in this stupid life that i thought was going to be SO GRAND. AND SO EXCITING AND FUN. i feel so disappointed things are not going as i want at all. urger burger, says, ms daria.

    i feel overwhelmed. i feel frozen and stuck and unsure and just overwhelmed in every area. i don't even know where to turn or who understands. can someone please step in here and help me please please.

    dammit i feel so pist. i am so tired of feeling this way (irritation) i am so frustrated with nothing working out properly damn this all to heck. damn pist. pist. pist! rrrrrrrrrrr.

    f*ck it. i give up. i am actually tired of trying and hitting up against this brick wall anyhooha. so what. it probably won't work out anyway. why try. things rarely work out. not for me etc etc

    wow i am so freaking bored with all of this. bored with the lame dates and bored with the fighting of people i love. i am just freaking bored with all of it. UGH where is my inspiration? this sux. this is so deadbeat boring. zzzzzzzzzzz. snooze time. been there. done that. tell me something new why don't ya?

  5. bored bored bored. i'm going to go make some tea and just whatever. i feel tired of struggling. i'm gonna go make some tea and a nice little snack and brush my skin and hug my teddy bear. oh, my bear. oh my friend the bear. i love my bear. ah, this is nice, just sitting here with my hot tea and stroking my lovely body. dayum i have a bangin' body. shoot. guys must be out of their mind to not want to get with me. heck to them. i'm just gonna do my goddess thing and just waterwheel and there are a ton of gusy right this second wishin' they could get with me.

    hey you know that business coach really helped me alot. i feel so awesome about that. wow. things are just getting better and better everyday. and i have a nice roof over my head that i don't have to pay for and i am kind of taken care of in this moment.

    i'm not exactly sure why i am still living here but i KNOW IT'S NOT FOREVER. i mean absolutely that factor of my life will change at some point and it will be so fun to have my own place and fix it up nice like i like it. and maybe even make it comfy cozy in one room like my friend used to have his. with the video games and yes that was nice. i'm gonna have a space like that in my apartment or condo or castle or whatever comes down the pike for me. because i am on my way. i am doing just great actually. there may be things i CAN'T CONTROL about OTHER PEOPLE and THEIR CHOICES about THEIR OWN life or death. but if i just stay SELFISHLY FOCUSSED ON MY OWN HAPPINESS AND PLEASURE i am certain things will work out really pleasurable for me. ah yes, i love to brush my beautiful skin and love myself and care for myself. ah, life feels pretty good. and it feels better and better for me everyday. thank you.

  6. Daria~

    You rock and I love you. :) Thanks for following my new blog! how has life been in your lovely world?